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 Post subject: Re: CO Trip Wire (Comments are good)[Rating Open]
PostPosted: Mon Aug 07, 2006 12:01 pm 
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Posts: 1401
TheChronoMaster wrote:
Name: Trip Wire

Army: Green Earth

Bio: The trap master, a wizard of tricks.

Quote: “Please don’t go over there, that thing could go off…”

Hit: Victory, fooling his enemies
Miss: Defeat, being fooled

Description: Somewhere in his mid twenties, Trip wears an olive drab military uniform and carries several wires and digging tools with him. He is somewhat weathered from all his scouting for good trap locations, but doesn’t have and major physical deformities to speak of. He has blond hair, in a simple buzzcut.

Sprite: None. You can attempt, if you feel the need.

Personality: Trip takes no nonsense, and tolerates nothing less than victory from his troops. He is a bit blunt and unemotional, though this could be from his experience in the infantry. He isn’t what you’d call a kind fellow, though he does get along fairly well with others. He doesn’t show off, or act too recklessly in battle.



History: As a young boy growing up in rural Green Earth, Trip was always fascinated with War, albiet a romanticized, propagandized version of it. He and his friends used to play war games, and it was there that Trip's natural affinity for traps came into focus. Rope traps, crossing lines that set off fireworks, Trip's side usually won the war games because he kept thinking up new traps to pull on the other side. Of course, these traps never hurt anyone, all of them were just to slow the other side down, or freak them out.

As he grew older, Trip began researching more lethal traps, that he could use if he ever made it into the army. Punji Pits, proximity mines, snare traps, he ate it up, experimenting with hiding traps.

In the Cosmo Land War, Trip was drafted into the Green Earth Infantry Corps under Drake just before Andy's unit passed through. His particular unit never saw combat with Orange Star, though he did hear some stories about how the enemy seemed a bit reluctant. His unit did see action in the final battle however, this time under Eagle's wing. His unit was cornered by two tank divisions, but some creative use of fuel from a nearby APC set up a firewall trap, allowing them to hold out long enough to be rescued. Eagle took note of the unusual tactic, but didn't believe that one act of heroism should be enough for an infantryman to become a CO. Nevertheless, Trip made his way through the ranks of the Green Earth Infantry Corps, eventually making it to a command position.

That position was Green Earth Frontline Commander, the highest rank in the army below CO. His job, simply, was to take command in minor battles that a CO could not attend. He was selected as a CO for “Bravery Above and Beyond the Call of Duty”, and strategic prowess. While Eagle was attempting to rescue Sami, and Drake was fending off Hawke’s airstrike, a small Black Hole force pierced the open spot in Green Earth defenses created by this. Hawke left one of his minor commanders to deal with Drake, seizing the opportunity created by this gap. A large force cut off the contingent led by Trip from resupply, and Hawke demanded surrender.

A letter arrived at Black Hole HQ the next day, which contained one thing: A picture of Trip holding up “The Finger”.

Hawke, collected as always, ordered that the smaller Green Earth force be crushed. Wave after wave of Black Hole forces attacked the area, but Trip had set up booby traps, road blocks, and even things as simple as fog generators to slow the enemy down, and pick them off one by one. However, Trip hadn't counted on heavy indirect fire, and airstrikes, and his troops were battered from above. Eventually, after 8 days, Jess arrived to rescue the weary Green Earth force. Seeing that they had not only held out, but come out with fewer casualties than expected, Jess initiated Trip as a CO.

During the Omega Land war, Trip guarded the Macro Land area while Eagle and Jess were assisting the Allied Nations on the front, and Drake was watching Cosmo Land. He has seen little action on the front lines as a full CO, but is nevertheless confident in his skills.



Skill: Trip's land units dig in for the long haul, giving them one more terrain star than they should have in all terrains. However, his protection against airstrikes and indirect attacks isn't very good, so all land units are 100/80 against air and indirect units.

Power Meter: **00000

CO Power: Trap Trigger
Trip sets up booby traps in places the enemy wouldn't think to look. All enemy land units take 1 damage.

Super Power: Trick Trap
Trip sets up obvious traps to fool his foes. When an obvious one is disarmed, a hidden one goes off. Enemy land units take 1 damage for every square they travel.

Power Quotes:
“Was it the red wire, or the blue one?”
“Spike pit here, C4 there…”
“Go ahead…try to attack!”
“I wouldn’t go that way, if I were you…”
“I’m all set up. Come on!”
“Right, don’t touch that log…”

Tag in Quotes:
“Hey, let me finish digging this…”
“My turn? Let me cut this wire…”
“I’m up? Make sure to warn our guys about that spot…”

Win Quotes:
“Ah, nothing like a win.”
“Don’t look in that pit, if you get sick easy…”
“Planning is all it takes.”

Tags:
Jess (110%)* Land Grab
GE COs: 105%
BH COs: 90%
Hawke: 85%

Tag Quotes:

Jess: “Are you sure you disarmed them all?”
Trip: “Just don’t let people into the woods for a few weeks…”

Jess: “My men tell me they found a small metal box in the field…”
Trip: “Yeah, don’t touch that.”

Trip: “That slowed them down.”
Jess: “And it’ll take us months to get those traps out…”

Trip: “We win the battle, of course.”
Jess: “And take the time to clean up our mess.”

EDIT 1: Un-Blandified, added an effect to the power.

EDIT 2: Removed D2D weakness, changed power, cut a COP star, added 2 SCOP stars.

EDIT 3: Expanded bio to include Cosmo Land war.

EDIT 4a: Did a huge edit, but lost everything due to computer crash. SCOP editted, weakness added.

EDIT 4b: Bio edit.



CO Tripwire

Name: 4/5
No real problems,.

Bio: 16/20
Funny. It seems that a lot of the GE CCO`s grew up in rural Green Earth.
I don`t know if it conflicts with the timeline, but it is pretty cool.


Quotes: 15/15
By FAR, the strongest aspect of TripWire, these are hilarious and go with him very well.

Creative Total: 35/40
Not bad,not bad at all.

Skill: 50/70
I don`t like it. An Extra Terrain Star.(Hello Lash!) and his weakness isn`t that much considering they would be destroyed fairly easy by Air and Indirect units

+65 Base
-10 Terrain Star
-5 Uneeded Weakness.


COP: 35/40
Power Spam Friendly, and nice mass damage. Seems okay.
+35 base
+3 Because I like it more then normal.


SCOP: 20/40
This is the most overpowered thing I`ve seen.
You realize that Infantrys will be taking (3 or 4, I can`t remember how far they move!) damage. Tanks will take more! Shuttlerunners could KILL THEMSELVES IN ONE TURN BY MOVING!!!

+35 Base
-15 No. Overpowered please make it different!


Tags: 7/10

Fine except for the fact that you never explained Jess`s tag.
Also, just putting GE Co`s BM Co`s bad.

+9 Base Score
-1 Jess
-2 Generalized Tags=Bad


Technical Total: 112/160
May God Help You.

Grand Total: 147/200
Creative Section is very good. Just balance the Tech Section.

140-164 - Image

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Last edited by Fatdude on Mon Aug 07, 2006 12:16 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Aug 07, 2006 12:03 pm 
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Posts: 10286
Location: TF2
About TW's theme... might I ask what style you want?


I'm having trouble coming up with something.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Aug 07, 2006 12:23 pm 
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Joined: Fri Jun 23, 2006 4:51 am
Posts: 1357
Location: A place where I always forget this place.
Hmm...

Something creepy, but light, if you know what I mean. Preferably within no established Genre, with strange instruments.

_________________
My CCOs, Concepts, and other Crap:
Chris Cross, of Black Hole. (My least creative CCO, sorry. He's my baby, for all these years...)
Trip Wire, of Green Earth. (My thoughts: He has potential...)
Alden of Blue Moon. (Complete, except long bio. Look at him and comment, or I kill a puppy.) (Possibly my most creative CCO...)

Pointless DoR/DC CO concepts. They frighten those of you who actually know what you're talking about.


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 Post subject: Re: CO Trip Wire (Comments are good)[Rating Open]
PostPosted: Mon Aug 07, 2006 12:29 pm 
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Joined: Fri Jun 23, 2006 4:51 am
Posts: 1357
Location: A place where I always forget this place.
Chrono's comments in blue.

Fatdude wrote:
TheChronoMaster wrote:
Name: Trip Wire

Army: Green Earth

Bio: The trap master, a wizard of tricks.

Quote: “Please don’t go over there, that thing could go off…”

Hit: Victory, fooling his enemies
Miss: Defeat, being fooled

Description: Somewhere in his mid twenties, Trip wears an olive drab military uniform and carries several wires and digging tools with him. He is somewhat weathered from all his scouting for good trap locations, but doesn’t have and major physical deformities to speak of. He has blond hair, in a simple buzzcut.

Sprite: None. You can attempt, if you feel the need.

Personality: Trip takes no nonsense, and tolerates nothing less than victory from his troops. He is a bit blunt and unemotional, though this could be from his experience in the infantry. He isn’t what you’d call a kind fellow, though he does get along fairly well with others. He doesn’t show off, or act too recklessly in battle.



History: As a young boy growing up in rural Green Earth, Trip was always fascinated with War, albiet a romanticized, propagandized version of it. He and his friends used to play war games, and it was there that Trip's natural affinity for traps came into focus. Rope traps, crossing lines that set off fireworks, Trip's side usually won the war games because he kept thinking up new traps to pull on the other side. Of course, these traps never hurt anyone, all of them were just to slow the other side down, or freak them out.

As he grew older, Trip began researching more lethal traps, that he could use if he ever made it into the army. Punji Pits, proximity mines, snare traps, he ate it up, experimenting with hiding traps.

In the Cosmo Land War, Trip was drafted into the Green Earth Infantry Corps under Drake just before Andy's unit passed through. His particular unit never saw combat with Orange Star, though he did hear some stories about how the enemy seemed a bit reluctant. His unit did see action in the final battle however, this time under Eagle's wing. His unit was cornered by two tank divisions, but some creative use of fuel from a nearby APC set up a firewall trap, allowing them to hold out long enough to be rescued. Eagle took note of the unusual tactic, but didn't believe that one act of heroism should be enough for an infantryman to become a CO. Nevertheless, Trip made his way through the ranks of the Green Earth Infantry Corps, eventually making it to a command position.

That position was Green Earth Frontline Commander, the highest rank in the army below CO. His job, simply, was to take command in minor battles that a CO could not attend. He was selected as a CO for “Bravery Above and Beyond the Call of Duty”, and strategic prowess. While Eagle was attempting to rescue Sami, and Drake was fending off Hawke’s airstrike, a small Black Hole force pierced the open spot in Green Earth defenses created by this. Hawke left one of his minor commanders to deal with Drake, seizing the opportunity created by this gap. A large force cut off the contingent led by Trip from resupply, and Hawke demanded surrender.

A letter arrived at Black Hole HQ the next day, which contained one thing: A picture of Trip holding up “The Finger”.

Hawke, collected as always, ordered that the smaller Green Earth force be crushed. Wave after wave of Black Hole forces attacked the area, but Trip had set up booby traps, road blocks, and even things as simple as fog generators to slow the enemy down, and pick them off one by one. However, Trip hadn't counted on heavy indirect fire, and airstrikes, and his troops were battered from above. Eventually, after 8 days, Jess arrived to rescue the weary Green Earth force. Seeing that they had not only held out, but come out with fewer casualties than expected, Jess initiated Trip as a CO.

During the Omega Land war, Trip guarded the Macro Land area while Eagle and Jess were assisting the Allied Nations on the front, and Drake was watching Cosmo Land. He has seen little action on the front lines as a full CO, but is nevertheless confident in his skills.



Skill: Trip's land units dig in for the long haul, giving them one more terrain star than they should have in all terrains. However, his protection against airstrikes and indirect attacks isn't very good, so all land units are 100/80 against air and indirect units.

Power Meter: **00000

CO Power: Trap Trigger
Trip sets up booby traps in places the enemy wouldn't think to look. All enemy land units take 1 damage.

Super Power: Trick Trap
Trip sets up obvious traps to fool his foes. When an obvious one is disarmed, a hidden one goes off. Enemy land units take 1 damage for every square they travel.

Power Quotes:
“Was it the red wire, or the blue one?”
“Spike pit here, C4 there…”
“Go ahead…try to attack!”
“I wouldn’t go that way, if I were you…”
“I’m all set up. Come on!”
“Right, don’t touch that log…”

Tag in Quotes:
“Hey, let me finish digging this…”
“My turn? Let me cut this wire…”
“I’m up? Make sure to warn our guys about that spot…”

Win Quotes:
“Ah, nothing like a win.”
“Don’t look in that pit, if you get sick easy…”
“Planning is all it takes.”

Tags:
Jess (110%)* Land Grab
GE COs: 105%
BH COs: 90%
Hawke: 85%

Tag Quotes:

Jess: “Are you sure you disarmed them all?”
Trip: “Just don’t let people into the woods for a few weeks…”

Jess: “My men tell me they found a small metal box in the field…”
Trip: “Yeah, don’t touch that.”

Trip: “That slowed them down.”
Jess: “And it’ll take us months to get those traps out…”

Trip: “We win the battle, of course.”
Jess: “And take the time to clean up our mess.”

EDIT 1: Un-Blandified, added an effect to the power.

EDIT 2: Removed D2D weakness, changed power, cut a COP star, added 2 SCOP stars.

EDIT 3: Expanded bio to include Cosmo Land war.

EDIT 4a: Did a huge edit, but lost everything due to computer crash. SCOP editted, weakness added.

EDIT 4b: Bio edit.



CO Tripwire

Name: 4/5
No real problems,.

This just annoys me. A name gets 5 if it's a pun connected with a real or real-sounding name, you know.

Bio: 16/20
Funny. It seems that a lot of the GE CCO`s grew up in rural Green Earth.
I don`t know if it conflicts with the timeline, but it is pretty cool.


Quotes: 15/15
By FAR, the strongest aspect of TripWire, these are hilarious and go with him very well.

Creative Total: 35/40
Not bad,not bad at all.

Skill: 50/70
I don`t like it. An Extra Terrain Star.(Hello Lash!) and his weakness isn`t that much considering they would be destroyed fairly easy by Air and Indirect units

+65 Base
-10 Terrain Star
-5 Uneeded Weakness.


...Lash gets no single extra terrain star. I don't know of any CO who does. Uneeded weakness? So, I should just give him a free terrain star? No, it's more powerful than you might think.

COP: 35/40
Power Spam Friendly, and nice mass damage. Seems okay.
+35 base
+3 Because I like it more then normal.


SCOP: 20/40
This is the most overpowered thing I`ve seen.
You realize that Infantrys will be taking (3 or 4, I can`t remember how far they move!) damage. Tanks will take more! Shuttlerunners could KILL THEMSELVES IN ONE TURN BY MOVING!!!

+35 Base
-15 No. Overpowered please make it different!


But I ask you, what person in his or her right mind would actually move that far after this is used? It's up to the other person how much they want to hurt themselves, and that's what keeps it balanced.

Tags: 7/10

Fine except for the fact that you never explained Jess`s tag.
Also, just putting GE Co`s BM Co`s bad.

+9 Base Score
-1 Jess
-2 Generalized Tags=Bad


How are generalized tags bad? OS has them. Adder has them. YC has them...And Jess is explained in his bio, she initiated him as a CO, it only makes sense...

Technical Total: 112/160
May God Help You.

Grand Total: 147/200
Creative Section is very good. Just balance the Tech Section.

140-164 - Image

_________________
My CCOs, Concepts, and other Crap:
Chris Cross, of Black Hole. (My least creative CCO, sorry. He's my baby, for all these years...)
Trip Wire, of Green Earth. (My thoughts: He has potential...)
Alden of Blue Moon. (Complete, except long bio. Look at him and comment, or I kill a puppy.) (Possibly my most creative CCO...)

Pointless DoR/DC CO concepts. They frighten those of you who actually know what you're talking about.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 07, 2006 12:35 pm 
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Location: I'd put something clever here, but you'd expect that
lol SCOP is Artemis's COP except more, and Artemis's COP is a rip-off of Aira's. >_>

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 07, 2006 12:44 pm 
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Location: Should be programming AI and Sound
hmm...I really hope you can work this CO out into VB material - I likes the cuts of his gib.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 07, 2006 11:48 pm 
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Deoxy wrote:
lol SCOP is Artemis's COP except more, and Artemis's COP is a rip-off of Aira's. >_>


lol Deoxy hasn't gotten over Aira being nayed. lol Arty predates Aira.

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 Post subject: Re: CO Trip Wire (Comments are good)[Rating Open]
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2006 1:28 am 
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Joined: Fri Jun 23, 2006 1:32 am
Posts: 1401
TheChronoMaster wrote:
Chrono's comments in blue.

Fatdude wrote:
TheChronoMaster wrote:
Name: Trip Wire

Army: Green Earth

Bio: The trap master, a wizard of tricks.

Quote: “Please don’t go over there, that thing could go off…”

Hit: Victory, fooling his enemies
Miss: Defeat, being fooled

Description: Somewhere in his mid twenties, Trip wears an olive drab military uniform and carries several wires and digging tools with him. He is somewhat weathered from all his scouting for good trap locations, but doesn’t have and major physical deformities to speak of. He has blond hair, in a simple buzzcut.

Sprite: None. You can attempt, if you feel the need.

Personality: Trip takes no nonsense, and tolerates nothing less than victory from his troops. He is a bit blunt and unemotional, though this could be from his experience in the infantry. He isn’t what you’d call a kind fellow, though he does get along fairly well with others. He doesn’t show off, or act too recklessly in battle.



History: As a young boy growing up in rural Green Earth, Trip was always fascinated with War, albiet a romanticized, propagandized version of it. He and his friends used to play war games, and it was there that Trip's natural affinity for traps came into focus. Rope traps, crossing lines that set off fireworks, Trip's side usually won the war games because he kept thinking up new traps to pull on the other side. Of course, these traps never hurt anyone, all of them were just to slow the other side down, or freak them out.

As he grew older, Trip began researching more lethal traps, that he could use if he ever made it into the army. Punji Pits, proximity mines, snare traps, he ate it up, experimenting with hiding traps.

In the Cosmo Land War, Trip was drafted into the Green Earth Infantry Corps under Drake just before Andy's unit passed through. His particular unit never saw combat with Orange Star, though he did hear some stories about how the enemy seemed a bit reluctant. His unit did see action in the final battle however, this time under Eagle's wing. His unit was cornered by two tank divisions, but some creative use of fuel from a nearby APC set up a firewall trap, allowing them to hold out long enough to be rescued. Eagle took note of the unusual tactic, but didn't believe that one act of heroism should be enough for an infantryman to become a CO. Nevertheless, Trip made his way through the ranks of the Green Earth Infantry Corps, eventually making it to a command position.

That position was Green Earth Frontline Commander, the highest rank in the army below CO. His job, simply, was to take command in minor battles that a CO could not attend. He was selected as a CO for “Bravery Above and Beyond the Call of Duty”, and strategic prowess. While Eagle was attempting to rescue Sami, and Drake was fending off Hawke’s airstrike, a small Black Hole force pierced the open spot in Green Earth defenses created by this. Hawke left one of his minor commanders to deal with Drake, seizing the opportunity created by this gap. A large force cut off the contingent led by Trip from resupply, and Hawke demanded surrender.

A letter arrived at Black Hole HQ the next day, which contained one thing: A picture of Trip holding up “The Finger”.

Hawke, collected as always, ordered that the smaller Green Earth force be crushed. Wave after wave of Black Hole forces attacked the area, but Trip had set up booby traps, road blocks, and even things as simple as fog generators to slow the enemy down, and pick them off one by one. However, Trip hadn't counted on heavy indirect fire, and airstrikes, and his troops were battered from above. Eventually, after 8 days, Jess arrived to rescue the weary Green Earth force. Seeing that they had not only held out, but come out with fewer casualties than expected, Jess initiated Trip as a CO.

During the Omega Land war, Trip guarded the Macro Land area while Eagle and Jess were assisting the Allied Nations on the front, and Drake was watching Cosmo Land. He has seen little action on the front lines as a full CO, but is nevertheless confident in his skills.



Skill: Trip's land units dig in for the long haul, giving them one more terrain star than they should have in all terrains. However, his protection against airstrikes and indirect attacks isn't very good, so all land units are 100/80 against air and indirect units.

Power Meter: **00000

CO Power: Trap Trigger
Trip sets up booby traps in places the enemy wouldn't think to look. All enemy land units take 1 damage.

Super Power: Trick Trap
Trip sets up obvious traps to fool his foes. When an obvious one is disarmed, a hidden one goes off. Enemy land units take 1 damage for every square they travel.

Power Quotes:
“Was it the red wire, or the blue one?”
“Spike pit here, C4 there…”
“Go ahead…try to attack!”
“I wouldn’t go that way, if I were you…”
“I’m all set up. Come on!”
“Right, don’t touch that log…”

Tag in Quotes:
“Hey, let me finish digging this…”
“My turn? Let me cut this wire…”
“I’m up? Make sure to warn our guys about that spot…”

Win Quotes:
“Ah, nothing like a win.”
“Don’t look in that pit, if you get sick easy…”
“Planning is all it takes.”

Tags:
Jess (110%)* Land Grab
GE COs: 105%
BH COs: 90%
Hawke: 85%

Tag Quotes:

Jess: “Are you sure you disarmed them all?”
Trip: “Just don’t let people into the woods for a few weeks…”

Jess: “My men tell me they found a small metal box in the field…”
Trip: “Yeah, don’t touch that.”

Trip: “That slowed them down.”
Jess: “And it’ll take us months to get those traps out…”

Trip: “We win the battle, of course.”
Jess: “And take the time to clean up our mess.”

EDIT 1: Un-Blandified, added an effect to the power.

EDIT 2: Removed D2D weakness, changed power, cut a COP star, added 2 SCOP stars.

EDIT 3: Expanded bio to include Cosmo Land war.

EDIT 4a: Did a huge edit, but lost everything due to computer crash. SCOP editted, weakness added.

EDIT 4b: Bio edit.



CO Tripwire

Name: 4/5
No real problems,.

This just annoys me. A name gets 5 if it's a pun connected with a real or real-sounding name, you know.
No reason to change the rate.

Bio: 16/20
Funny. It seems that a lot of the GE CCO`s grew up in rural Green Earth.
I don`t know if it conflicts with the timeline, but it is pretty cool.


Quotes: 15/15
By FAR, the strongest aspect of TripWire, these are hilarious and go with him very well.

Creative Total: 35/40
Not bad,not bad at all.

Skill: 60/70
I don`t like it. An Extra Terrain Star.(Hello Lash!) and his weakness isn`t that much considering they would be destroyed fairly easy by Air and Indirect units

+65 Base
-5 Uneeded Weakness.


...Lash gets no single extra terrain star. I don't know of any CO who does. Uneeded weakness? So, I should just give him a free terrain star? No, it's more powerful than you might think.

How? Most land units can be destroyed by Indirects and Air Units pretty quickly. Without the weakness.
That being said, [b]maybe
the Terrain Star balances it.[/b]

COP: 35/40
Power Spam Friendly, and nice mass damage. Seems okay.
+35 base
+3 Because I like it more then normal.


SCOP: 27/40
This is the most overpowered thing I`ve seen.
You realize that Infantrys will be taking (3 or 4, I can`t remember how far they move!) damage. Tanks will take more! Shuttlerunners could KILL THEMSELVES IN ONE TURN BY MOVING!!!

+35 Base
-8 Undercosted


But I ask you, what person in his or her right mind would actually move that far after this is used? It's up to the other person how much they want to hurt themselves, and that's what keeps it balanced.

This might cost too little.


Tags: 8/10

Fine except for the fact that you never explained Jess`s tag.
Also, just putting GE Co`s BM Co`s bad.

+9 Base Score
-2 Generalized Tags=Bad


How are generalized tags bad? OS has them. Adder has them. YC has them...And Jess is explained in his bio, she initiated him as a CO, it only makes sense...

Technical Total: 133/160
..Rerated..

Grand Total: 165/200
Creative Section is very good. Just balance the Tech Section.

:arank: Rerated. Extremely Low A-Rank.

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2006 2:09 am 
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Joined: Fri Jun 23, 2006 4:51 am
Posts: 1357
Location: A place where I always forget this place.
Thanks. I just comment on what raters say, and I do like it when they respond.

_________________
My CCOs, Concepts, and other Crap:
Chris Cross, of Black Hole. (My least creative CCO, sorry. He's my baby, for all these years...)
Trip Wire, of Green Earth. (My thoughts: He has potential...)
Alden of Blue Moon. (Complete, except long bio. Look at him and comment, or I kill a puppy.) (Possibly my most creative CCO...)

Pointless DoR/DC CO concepts. They frighten those of you who actually know what you're talking about.


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PostPosted: Sun Aug 13, 2006 3:55 am 
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Joined: Wed Jun 28, 2006 3:56 am
Posts: 1094
Location: Flying through plotholes
TheChronoMaster wrote:
Name: Trip Wire

Army: Green Earth

Bio: The trap master, a wizard of tricks.

Quote: “Please don’t go over there, that thing could go off…”

Hit: Victory, fooling his enemies
Miss: Defeat, being fooled

Description: Somewhere in his mid twenties, Trip wears an olive drab military uniform and carries several wires and digging tools with him. He is somewhat weathered from all his scouting for good trap locations, but doesn’t have and major physical deformities to speak of. He has blond hair, in a simple buzzcut.

Sprite: None. You can attempt, if you feel the need.

Personality: Trip takes no nonsense, and tolerates nothing less than victory from his troops. He is a bit blunt and unemotional, though this could be from his experience in the infantry. He isn’t what you’d call a kind fellow, though he does get along fairly well with others. He doesn’t show off, or act too recklessly in battle.



History: As a young boy growing up in rural Green Earth, Trip was always fascinated with War, albiet a romanticized, propagandized version of it. He and his friends used to play war games, and it was there that Trip's natural affinity for traps came into focus. Rope traps, crossing lines that set off fireworks, Trip's side usually won the war games because he kept thinking up new traps to pull on the other side. Of course, these traps never hurt anyone, all of them were just to slow the other side down, or freak them out.

As he grew older, Trip began researching more lethal traps, that he could use if he ever made it into the army. Punji Pits, proximity mines, snare traps, he ate it up, experimenting with hiding traps.

In the Cosmo Land War, Trip was drafted into the Green Earth Infantry Corps under Drake just before Andy's unit passed through. His particular unit never saw combat with Orange Star, though he did hear some stories about how the enemy seemed a bit reluctant. His unit did see action in the final battle however, this time under Eagle's wing. His unit was cornered by two tank divisions, but some creative use of fuel from a nearby APC set up a firewall trap, allowing them to hold out long enough to be rescued. Eagle took note of the unusual tactic, but didn't believe that one act of heroism should be enough for an infantryman to become a CO. Nevertheless, Trip made his way through the ranks of the Green Earth Infantry Corps, eventually making it to a command position.

That position was Green Earth Frontline Commander, the highest rank in the army below CO. His job, simply, was to take command in minor battles that a CO could not attend. He was selected as a CO for “Bravery Above and Beyond the Call of Duty”, and strategic prowess. While Eagle was attempting to rescue Sami, and Drake was fending off Hawke’s airstrike, a small Black Hole force pierced the open spot in Green Earth defenses created by this. Hawke left one of his minor commanders to deal with Drake, seizing the opportunity created by this gap. A large force cut off the contingent led by Trip from resupply, and Hawke demanded surrender.

A letter arrived at Black Hole HQ the next day, which contained one thing: A picture of Trip holding up “The Finger”.

Hawke, collected as always, ordered that the smaller Green Earth force be crushed. Wave after wave of Black Hole forces attacked the area, but Trip had set up booby traps, road blocks, and even things as simple as fog generators to slow the enemy down, and pick them off one by one. However, Trip hadn't counted on heavy indirect fire, and airstrikes, and his troops were battered from above. Eventually, after 8 days, Jess arrived to rescue the weary Green Earth force. Seeing that they had not only held out, but come out with fewer casualties than expected, Jess initiated Trip as a CO.

During the Omega Land war, Trip guarded the Macro Land area while Eagle and Jess were assisting the Allied Nations on the front, and Drake was watching Cosmo Land. He has seen little action on the front lines as a full CO, but is nevertheless confident in his skills.



Skill: Trip's land units dig in for the long haul, giving them one more terrain star than they should have in all terrains. However, his protection against airstrikes and indirect attacks isn't very good, so all land units are 100/80 against air and indirect units.

Power Meter: **00000

CO Power: Trap Trigger
Trip sets up booby traps in places the enemy wouldn't think to look. All enemy land units take 1 damage.

Super Power: Trick Trap
Trip sets up obvious traps to fool his foes. When an obvious one is disarmed, a hidden one goes off. Enemy land units take 1 damage for every square they travel.

Power Quotes:
“Was it the red wire, or the blue one?”
“Spike pit here, C4 there…”
“Go ahead…try to attack!”
“I wouldn’t go that way, if I were you…”
“I’m all set up. Come on!”
“Right, don’t touch that log…”

Tag in Quotes:
“Hey, let me finish digging this…”
“My turn? Let me cut this wire…”
“I’m up? Make sure to warn our guys about that spot…”

Win Quotes:
“Ah, nothing like a win.”
“Don’t look in that pit, if you get sick easy…”
“Planning is all it takes.”

Tags:
Jess (110%)* Land Grab
GE COs: 105%
BH COs: 90%
Hawke: 85%

Tag Quotes:

Jess: “Are you sure you disarmed them all?”
Trip: “Just don’t let people into the woods for a few weeks…”

Jess: “My men tell me they found a small metal box in the field…”
Trip: “Yeah, don’t touch that.”

Trip: “That slowed them down.”
Jess: “And it’ll take us months to get those traps out…”

Trip: “We win the battle, of course.”
Jess: “And take the time to clean up our mess.”

EDIT 1: Un-Blandified, added an effect to the power.

EDIT 2: Removed D2D weakness, changed power, cut a COP star, added 2 SCOP stars.

EDIT 3: Expanded bio to include Cosmo Land war.

EDIT 4a: Did a huge edit, but lost everything due to computer crash. SCOP editted, weakness added.

EDIT 4b: Bio edit.


Name: 5/5

Do I really need to say it, the name fits the Co and his powers, (even if it is a little odd.) and is one you will remember.

5 Perfect name

Bio: 13/20

Hmm, you kept it short and eventful, and most of it made sense, except for this part.
Quote:
Eagle took note of the unusual tactic, but didn't believe that one act of heroism should be enough for an infantryman to become a CO. Nevertheless, Trip made his way through the ranks of the Green Earth Infantry Corps, eventually making it to a command position.

I hate it when the charcter "quickly rises through the ranks" and in this case is the only flaw to the bio.

20
-7 "Quickly rose through the ranks" cliche

Quotes: 15/15

These have got to be some of the funniest quotes I have ever read and they fit the charcter perfectly. No need for change whatsoever.

15 Awesome quotes

Creative Total: 33/40

Fix up the cliche in the bio and you're golden.

Skill: 47/70

Ouch, only 80 defense against air and indirect fire. A bomber could pretty much OHKO any ground unit with this weakness. On top of that, the skill doesn't make any sense for this character. I mean shouldn't a master of traps do random HP or supply reduction ?

70
-15 Overpowered weakness
-8 Doesn't make sense with character

COP: 27/40

I'm pretty sure this power has been done before (Maybe an early version of Talyx?) and in my opinion is pretty boring. With how boring his stats were you should have something a little more interesting.

40
-5 Been done before
-8 Boring

SCOP: 30/40

Once again I believe this has been done before, but in this case fits the character better than the COP/D2D.

40
-10 Two "been done before"s in a row

Tags: 10/10

Nothing wrong here. One excellent, but not all encompassing tag with the basic national bonuses versus enemy nation tags. Basically what all tags should be.

10 Nothing wrong here

Technical Total: 114/160
Needs significant work with the powers.





Final Total: 147/200
:brank:

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PostPosted: Sun Aug 13, 2006 4:46 am 
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As a note, it doesn't matter if it's been done before, it matters if it's the same as something else in CW, which it isn't.

Random HP and supply reduction is really hard to balance. I think it fits him just fine, and with an extra terrain star, he's only 100/90 against air and indirect, really. Sure a few units will get mauled by bombers, but that's true of any CO, a crippled unit is just as bad as a destroyed unit.

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Chris Cross, of Black Hole. (My least creative CCO, sorry. He's my baby, for all these years...)
Trip Wire, of Green Earth. (My thoughts: He has potential...)
Alden of Blue Moon. (Complete, except long bio. Look at him and comment, or I kill a puppy.) (Possibly my most creative CCO...)

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PostPosted: Sat Aug 26, 2006 2:58 am 
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*punchbump*

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My CCOs, Concepts, and other Crap:
Chris Cross, of Black Hole. (My least creative CCO, sorry. He's my baby, for all these years...)
Trip Wire, of Green Earth. (My thoughts: He has potential...)
Alden of Blue Moon. (Complete, except long bio. Look at him and comment, or I kill a puppy.) (Possibly my most creative CCO...)

Pointless DoR/DC CO concepts. They frighten those of you who actually know what you're talking about.


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 20, 2006 2:37 am 
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If you are a rater, and have a spot open, Trip Wire is now on your list.

_________________
My CCOs, Concepts, and other Crap:
Chris Cross, of Black Hole. (My least creative CCO, sorry. He's my baby, for all these years...)
Trip Wire, of Green Earth. (My thoughts: He has potential...)
Alden of Blue Moon. (Complete, except long bio. Look at him and comment, or I kill a puppy.) (Possibly my most creative CCO...)

Pointless DoR/DC CO concepts. They frighten those of you who actually know what you're talking about.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 26, 2006 6:00 am 
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CO Trip Wire

Name: 4/5
It fits the theme, but it's not a name.
-1 For not being a name

Bio: 16/20
It works, shows how his theme, but wasn't amazing. Had the rising through the ranks cliche, which i detest. Overall good.
-3 Rising through the ranks cliche.
-1 Wasn't amazing


Quotes: 10/15
Lots of ellipses, which is alright, if annoying, and they're all similar, even though they do fit into the theme, and show a sort of personality.
-1 Loads of ellipses
-4 All very similar


Creative Total: 30/40
Maybe add some to the bio, and redo some quotes, and you're good. Good score though anyways.

Skill: 60/70
Erm, the D2D doesn't really link well to his theme, and befits a co with a siege theme better, though, it is a good D2D with a good weakness, with large links to his bio.
-10 Doesn't fit the theme

COP: 30/40
Woah.

1 mass damage.

You just exploded my head with originality XD.
I guess it fits the theme... but i md? Its really unoriginal, and y'could have done something really interesting for this... damage around cities perhaps?
-10 Goddammit it's unoriginal

SCOP: 37/40
Much, much more original. Basically, you're forcing ther enemy to stop their entire army, but if you pull it off right (or is it wrong?) you'll be forcing them to move to stop your infantry capturing something usefull etc. not much use at chokepoints, but thats a minor point, as its against the point of the scop. I can't see anything wrong at all. Maybe slightly overcosted?
-3 Slightly overcosted imo.

Tags: 10/10
Jess respullies, pushes forwards, and then they can't move next turn? Damn that's a good affinity. Absolutely nothing wrong.

Technical Total: 137/160
Redo that cop, and he'll be groovy.

Grand Total: 167/200
Just under a boothing score, sort out the cop, and some quotes, and the bio, and you'll be fine

:arank:

THIS IS A CLOSING.

REALLY.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 26, 2006 6:46 am 
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My thoughts:

COP is more meant to be usefull and quick than original and devastating. I think it works. I'll try and think up an alternative, and maybe hold a poll.

Pretty much half the COs in AW/CW abuse ellipses anyway. I'll find a workaround for those quotes, and try to differentiate them.

There's really no way to make a trap based CO have a fitting and balanced D2D. Damage for moving, larger fuel loss, and slower movement all fit the bill, but couldn't work well with a trap-based power. Fog also kinda works, but once again, doesn't fit into the D2D of any CO. Intel hiding is Sonja's game...Perhaps hiding infantry in forests automaticlly? Nah, too overpowered...Regardless, his D2D is my biggest problem.

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My CCOs, Concepts, and other Crap:
Chris Cross, of Black Hole. (My least creative CCO, sorry. He's my baby, for all these years...)
Trip Wire, of Green Earth. (My thoughts: He has potential...)
Alden of Blue Moon. (Complete, except long bio. Look at him and comment, or I kill a puppy.) (Possibly my most creative CCO...)

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Oct 04, 2006 1:24 am 
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Theme added. Bow down before x0.

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My CCOs, Concepts, and other Crap:
Chris Cross, of Black Hole. (My least creative CCO, sorry. He's my baby, for all these years...)
Trip Wire, of Green Earth. (My thoughts: He has potential...)
Alden of Blue Moon. (Complete, except long bio. Look at him and comment, or I kill a puppy.) (Possibly my most creative CCO...)

Pointless DoR/DC CO concepts. They frighten those of you who actually know what you're talking about.


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 Post subject: Re: GE CO - Trip Wire (Comments are good)[Rating Open]
PostPosted: Wed Oct 04, 2006 2:28 am 
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TheChronoMaster wrote:
Name: Trip Wire

Skill: Trip's land units dig in for the long haul, giving them one more terrain star than they should have in all terrains. However, his protection against airstrikes and indirect attacks isn't very good, so all land units are 100/80 against air and indirect units.

Power Meter: **00000

CO Power: Trap Trigger
Trip sets up booby traps in places the enemy wouldn't think to look. All enemy land units take 1 damage.

Super Power: Trick Trap
Trip sets up obvious traps to fool his foes. When an obvious one is disarmed, a hidden one goes off. Enemy land units take 1 damage for every square they travel.

Tags:
Jess (110%)* Land Grab
GE COs: 105%
BH COs: 90%
Hawke: 85%


Name: It works! 5/5

Bio: One major glaring problem with him, he's in GE but not related to a country. Eagle: Germany, Drake: England, Jess: France, Javier: Spain/ Portugal, Peter: Greece/ Turkey. It's a requirement that Sven's put on any GE CO that's getting into his campaign, so I think it should take points away. Vlad is Eastern European, but there's still other countries that you could use. Italy, Ireland, Scotland (go bagpipes!), etc.

Anyway, aside from that it's a typical "Joins armed forces, impressed superiors, got promoted" story. Nothing specifically wrong with it, but it's a bit cliche. However, there's no need to really change it if the stats are good enough. 13/20

Quotes: One too many switch quotes and a bio quote. I think you are the first person to give me too many quotes. I'd take out one of the switch quotes that has "Let me.." in them. They seem redundant. Aside from that, nothing really wows me. No corny puns! What is the world coming to? 11/15

Creative Total: 29/40

Abilities: So, his sea and air is bland. His land units get +10 defense in most situations, but -20 against indirects and air. Interesting. The extra terrain star is helpful, but can screw him over against a few other COs (Yukio's SCOP comes to mind). The -20 defense is a bit pointless against the indirects. They already maim you. But it helps the enemy air units. All in all, I'd say it's fairly balanced, but I think you should keep it within one category. Either "Land units get +1 terrain star, but -1 against indirects and air (minimum 0)" or "Land units are 100/110, but are 100/90 against enemy air and indirects." But yeah, I can't see any real problems with it except that the boost and weakness aren't related. Though it does screw Max on an all land map... 60/70

COP: 1 MD against enemy land units. It's overpowered in an all land game, but underpowered in island hopping or aerial matches. Honestly, I think you should change it to affect air/ sea in some way and bump it up a star. Otherwise it's too situational to be balanced at 2 stars. 32/40

SCOP: Once again, you run into the situational problem. It's useless against air and sea, so you are basically a blandie without powers on a map that contains mostly ocean tiles. Aside from that, this is a nasty power, but the nasty-ness is in the hands of the enemy. They can either choose to not move at all (giving you a free turn) or take massive damage. Either way, this is worth more than 7 stars. However, there is one other major issue. Artemis has this as a COP (http://www.customwars.com/viewtopic.php?t=1879). He's already in the game, so I highly doubt that you could sneak this in... 25/40

Tags: You've got quite a few there, but overall I'd say it's a bit underpowering to give negative tags to all the BH COs. 7/10

Technical Total: 124/160

Total Rank: 153/200 --> :brank:

His biggest issues are the fact that his powers do nothing to air/ sea and that his SCOP is already in the game. Other than that, the theme is nice and I wouldn't mind using him in CW...

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 08, 2006 4:02 am 
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Hmm...

I just had an Idea for his COP: It creates a "zone of control" around his units one space in every common direction, and enemy units must stop there.

Thoughts?

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My CCOs, Concepts, and other Crap:
Chris Cross, of Black Hole. (My least creative CCO, sorry. He's my baby, for all these years...)
Trip Wire, of Green Earth. (My thoughts: He has potential...)
Alden of Blue Moon. (Complete, except long bio. Look at him and comment, or I kill a puppy.) (Possibly my most creative CCO...)

Pointless DoR/DC CO concepts. They frighten those of you who actually know what you're talking about.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 23, 2006 11:22 am 
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I've noticed that Trip doesn't fit into the "European" theme of GE. So, how about I revamp him as British Special Forces, or something?

_________________
My CCOs, Concepts, and other Crap:
Chris Cross, of Black Hole. (My least creative CCO, sorry. He's my baby, for all these years...)
Trip Wire, of Green Earth. (My thoughts: He has potential...)
Alden of Blue Moon. (Complete, except long bio. Look at him and comment, or I kill a puppy.) (Possibly my most creative CCO...)

Pointless DoR/DC CO concepts. They frighten those of you who actually know what you're talking about.


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 24, 2006 10:33 pm 
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:skill: This is an overpowered ability, I think. Thanks to that extra terrain star, his weakness [for ground and naval units anyway] is actually 90 defense against indirects. At the moment I'm ignoring the air defense, because air combat is rare and an area which stats aren't overly noticeable. [Unless you're Kanbei or whatever.] Indirects already smash apart everything they attack, having ten less defense against them won't be noticeable. It is also very easy to avoid indirect fire, you just have to wait to make the right move. Which will be easier for Trip Wire to do, since his defense is better than yours.

:power: Not even a blandie can pull off one mass damage at two stars, apparently. You're certainly not a blandie. However, you've restricted it to one field of combat... but it's the most important field of combat. Air and naval battles are once again rare, and they are not as affected by mass damage as ground units are, in my experience. Overpowered a little bit.

:super: Artemis's COP times four. His COP is four stars, yours is seven. Four times four is sixteen. However he also does some rain attack boost nonsense, so let's take a star off. Three times four is twelve. Get what I'm saying here? This is a very overpowered ability. Everyone except indirects will be severely damaged, except for the random extreme close quarters chokepoint situation. Sure, it can be avoided entirely by the enemy not moving... but then you just spent seven stars for Lightning Strike. Ugh. This needs some work...

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 02, 2006 11:17 am 
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Mad bumpz. >_>

D2D: Meh, 1 terrain star is not all that great. Sorta underpowered leaning bland. The weakness is good, so keep it for the next attempt.

COP: Pwnt. Mebbe overused. Add more to it as well. Seems to bland.

SCOP: Lesse.
Mechs and Megas: Damage what?
Fighters and recons: RAPERAPERAPE.
But the cost is pretty high, so it sorta balances it out. Good theme.

Fix the D2D. It needs big boosts.

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 02, 2006 11:40 am 
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Comment because I've found this CO kinda interesting (and because his theme rules).

Hm. The current strength/weakness pairing is real situational, and I think the VS indirect defense drop may be a bit much. Of course, it turns into only a 10% drop for 10 HP units because of the terrain star thing, so I may be overestimating the ability...

The CO power is Helen's except excluding air and sea units, so that's somewhat questionable if the booth will accept it.

The SCOP is like killing enemy movement, except the enemy can still move if they want to... for a price. Personally, I think the price shouldn't go up anymore, because it's a real nasty ability, but not worth 8 or 9 stars. By the way, do they take the damage before or after their next action? Because that makes a massive difference. I say it should happen before they attack or anything, but obviously not until they choose attack. If it's after the attack/unload/whatever, it may only be a 6 star ability...

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 02, 2006 11:53 am 
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ChessRules wrote:
The CO power is Helen's except excluding air and sea units, so that's somewhat questionable if the booth will accept it.


The booth won't. 1 MD for 2 stars is nasty - especially since it interferes with 2 turn captures early game. I believe Helen was nayed for exactly that reason.

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 02, 2006 12:45 pm 
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But land only? I dunno, I think that's worth two stars.

Yes, damage happens before anything else.

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My CCOs, Concepts, and other Crap:
Chris Cross, of Black Hole. (My least creative CCO, sorry. He's my baby, for all these years...)
Trip Wire, of Green Earth. (My thoughts: He has potential...)
Alden of Blue Moon. (Complete, except long bio. Look at him and comment, or I kill a puppy.) (Possibly my most creative CCO...)

Pointless DoR/DC CO concepts. They frighten those of you who actually know what you're talking about.


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 25, 2007 1:02 am 
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ok lets see what we're dealing w/here

(In other words, I will be getting this rate done sometime today. I'm being homeschooled, so whenever I finish my work, which can be at any time, I'll whip something up)

Name: 0/3
Give him a real name or at least something you can at least pretend to be a real name. This seems like a corny gag used as a placeholder for a name to come, but I'm not willing to give it that much credit.

Bio: 7/10
I'll be frank with you: generic. The bio wasn't a very interesting read and neither was the personality. If anything, you should have stuck with nonchalant with a hint of mischievous as their quotes give off that impression. I'm going to be fair, though, and only take off three points because nothing was necessarily sloppy about it and you did what needed to be done.

Quote: 7/7
Impressive. They're all fitting and highly amusing. "I'm up? Make sure to warn our guys about that spot." That's an lol and a half right there.

Creative Section: 14/20
Needs more creative. And tank shell.

Skill: 45/60
That weakness is freaking awkward. The indirect defense loss is negligible as it doesn't make avoiding indirect fire any more imperative, just necessary and the air strike thing...makes no sense. Just trash it and keep the terrain star thing. It's good enough on its own.

COP: 55/60
We're not clear on whether or not this includes infantry and if it does, then that's a deduction for excessive capture phase rape capabilities. The lack of clarity will only drop this five points.

SCOP: 50/60
The first thing I caught wind of was how his power relies solely upon the judgment of the enemy. That's a pretty big risk to take, as you're left without any benefits other than the 10/10 boost during your turn and you might need a little bounceback from the enemy power. If they do nothing in fear of sustaining high injury, you're gonna get raped. If they move, they're still fucked, so you need to weigh the consequences of each path. I like this whole deal with the mind games. Still, it can be unreliable at times, depending on the situation and you're a sitting duck on the air and sea fronts.

All in all, pretty nice on first impression, but unstable as a whole.


Technical Total: 145/180
There is quite a bit of work to be done before I can genuinely approve of this.

Grand Total: 159/200
:brank:
I see potential in this guy. Think about my comments and call me when you've done a little fine tuning, if you'll require my services once more, that is.

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2007 3:37 am 
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And I'm done here.

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